I wish I could be like this foreverrrr

I wish that I could lay in bed forever
the blanket's warmth against my skin
my head gently resting on the pillow
my eyes barely open
as soft glowing light filters through my eyelashes
and I lay in a state of muddled happiness
unaware of all the evils that surround me
all the horrors in the world
because all I can see
all I can think about
is a soft glow that looks like
makes me feel like
everything is
and always will be
good

string me up

my heart gets confused
all tied in knots
not knowing what to think
of my latest predicament
wondering how it will ever
fix the mess I've made of it

sickkk

I really wish that my mind
would leave the door
to my memories of you
shut
but it never does
I try and put a padlock on it
and hide the key
but it always finds it
and brings back memories
that torture my soul
and make me ache
from the inside out
sitting here
all I can do is think about you
and know I'll never see you again

eeep

I wear my heart on my sleeve
affixed with piercing safety pins
but it's paper so it never bleeds
when I cry it gets soaked with tears
with wounds that can't be fixed with scotch tape
I need to escape

the attack of the writing utensils

one night I was laying in bed
my favorite black pen in hand
a notepad balanced on my knee
I absentmindedly made a large splotch
the ink flowing into a puddle
I stared at it quite blankly
suddenly it moved
very subtlety but it moved
it slowly began to grow
forming dark inky letters
it sluggishly spelled out the following message:

Dear So and So,
I'm quite sure you have absolutely no idea
what is going on
so I suggest you
WAKE UP!
love and kisses,
ink puddle

trees

your long, thin arms beckon
tempting me toward you
an umbrella of shade awaits
I rest lazily next to you
eyes threatening to close
my head rests gently
on the grassy pillow beneath my head
and I slowly drift off to sleep

smoothies

I pour out my heart for you
into a glass hoping you'll drink
you look it over like a state fair judge would a cow
sniff it, its sickly sweet smell apparently repulsive
then you hand it back and shake your head "no"
so I casually dump it down the drain
and turn on the garbage disposal
pretending it doesn't hurt

strike me

passion ignites like a match
it burns strong and bright at first
and everyone notices the light
but eventually the flame reaches your fingers
and burns you
and you drop it
the flames is snuffed out
never to be rekindled

hopes and dreams

I always end up left in the dust
while what I want speeds on by
leaving me to wonder what could have been
and know what will never be

zzzzzZZZZZZZZzzzzzzzzzzZZZZZzzzzz(- . -)

eyelids drooping like wilting leaves
my head rests heavily on my arm
fingers lazily moving across the keyboard
eyes not even looking at the screen
staring out into some far off place
dreaming of what I hope is to become
of that which I call life


[[these are the kind of poems you get late at night (^^) ]]

Obsidian

Ode to Ink

the ink flows from my pen
the black liquid an extension of my soul
it flows straight from my heart to the paper
confessing every truth I've ever known
every feeling I've ever felt
it speaks for me when I cannot speak for myself
and always knows just what to say

If it's not broken ... try, try again

I hate the feeling I get when I think about life
my stomach ties into a million knots
my body feels ready to fall to the floor
my mind always wanders to the same door
"worst case scenario" painted on it in bold letters
it's my own personal Pandora's Box
once I reach it I can never turn back
I open the door
not just a little
I swing it wide
darkness and horror envelop my being
I see all my worst nightmares come to life
ghastly pictures swim around my head
haunting sounds pour into my ears
I close my eyes tight and press my hands to my ears
but nothing works because it's not a nightmare anymore
it's reality

Samstag

Soo ... I have two poems today ...

looking glass lies
and red paper hearts
follow me like a disease
everywhere I look I see fake
it's on all the billboards
and lives inside the TV
it's a staple of society
can't turn a corner without
seeing a fake person's stare
a deluded rapture
a counterfeit kiss
it's all in a day's work
for the fakes of the world

[the above poem is where I got the name for this blog (^^) ]


you never look at me when we speak
you shove words into my mouth
that choke me like a gag
like a poison they seep through my being
and fill me with a feeling
a feeling of dread, death, and fear

Scotch Tape

I've decided to put some of my poetry out there ... but in a "I doubt anyone will ever see this blog" kind of way


Grave Mistake

you didn't take the normal route
no bullets
no gun
you decided to be different
cought syrup
whikey
exhaust
a deadly cocktail
your drink of choice one September night
lives came to a screeching halt
left with so many questions unanswered
why did you have to leave
all of us
not just him
answers we'll never learn
only ashes left now
buried in the earth
under stone
words carved don't begin to describe you
your quirky laugh
your comforting voice
I long to hear them
clinging to old videos for a taste
your laugh in the background
a prize seek

Dedicated to Auntie Kate